Hands from http://www.elderguard.org/
Caring for the elderly has been a need since early in time. With more household having two wage earners, elderly care especially by those sandwiched between young and old has become an ever-increasing topic.
- Whose responsible to help?
- Who is responsible to decide if or when outside assistance is needed?
- How are the costs of care provided when funds are exhausted?
- How do we draw qualified people into professions that provide this care?
- How can we slow or stall the need for elder care?
Personally and professionally I don’t know all the questions. Nor can I answer all the questions. I do believe awareness and conversation are important steps in caring for the elderly now and in the future.
A recent New York Times article by Judith Graham shared concerns regarding elder care in a rapidly aging world – specifically the growing ratio of elderly to young. In the article Ms Graham shares some important facts:
Almost 58 million people worldwide will turn 60 this year. By 2050, there will be more old people than children under the age of 15 for the first time in history…People live longer, with more chronic illnesses like high blood pressure or diabetes, in poorer health, requiring more attention from family members and costly medical care.
This sounds overwhelming to families, individuals, healthcare providers, insurance companies, and so forth. Ms Graham goes on offering this thought.
The best picture is this: People live longer, in good health, remaining productive, valued members of society who contribute in workplaces, communities and families through their later years, and are treated respectfully and supported economically and socially as they become frail.
In my views, the key is seeing people as “productive, valued members of society.” I apply this not just to the elders but to all ages. When we value the contribution of a person and see what they offer as being productive, we have created that first step towards seeing each other as people. Not statistics, not as a diagnosis, not as something less than human.
For this to happen, we need to be conversation, in relationship with other generations. This is why I offer intergenerational programming. Most of us find it easier to treat other with respect and value when it is what we have experienced and know is possible. By making these offering to the preschoolers and the adults who come with them to these groups, I aim for all to be a valued member of our group.
This is why I share my intergenerational ideas – so others will help grow this awareness and this experience.
One day, I hope to age into being a member of the ranks of the elderly who is productive and valued by society and those around me. For that reason, I will keep asking questions about caring for the elderly. I will keep demonstrating respect and value of my clients no matter their age or ability. I will continue to promote quality intergenerational programs that value what ALL members bring to the group. And I’ll keep the mantra from “Better People” by India Arie as my theme song:
Elderly care rises to top of voters’ concerns
JoAnn,
Your point about valuing the contribution of each person is huge. I think that we really need to refocus on that. I also like your reflection/reminder that we will each (if we are fortunate enough) be elderly at some time, and that talking about these issues in advance helps us as well.
Warmly,
Ann
It is easy to overlook the value of individuals even in every day life. From the janitor to the stick person to the checker – all are important in our shopping experience. Yet we may not say a word to these folks unless we have to.
Hi JoAnne – this is a very personal topic to me. It is no easy task to keep in mind that each person has a contribution when severe dementia begins to take over a persons personality and civilized functioning depends on a slew of (expensive) pharmaceuticals and expensive 24/7 care. Such a difficult time for the individual and the family. My brother & I are the closest in proximity, and I do most of the caregiving as I am the closest, both of us became quite ill, I was hospitalized when my mom’s dementia showed its ugly face. Neither of us are young, he is 65 and I am 55 and have a teenager at home, I couldn’t help him look at colleges the summer before his senior year. I literally could not do this. There wasnt enuf time in the day to pick up the care and the huge amt of tasks related to caring for an aging ill adult. One needs a village and one must buy a village. Very trying time.
Your challenges and frustrations are shared by many, Kathy. There is no easy answer. I pray your trials will become less and your thanksgivings for the moments will increase.
The business side (providing care, doctor visits, paying bills) tends to take over the stage. Yet, it is when we take time to truly interact and be present with the person that the individual and their contribution can be seen. The moments might be fleeting so unless we are paying attention we might miss them.
Often I have observed child accessing this inner person and drawing out the kindness and attentiveness that exists. In doing so, the child reminds those of us in the middle to be truly present. That is the power I find in intergenerational groups.
I want to choose a home care where I could at peace and I know that my love one is being treated well. but if I were to decide I would not take any elder people in my family. Why would I do that if I can take good care of them.Thank you for this awesome and helpful post.
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It is great to see more and more elderly people holding jobs that they love longer. I hope that’s a trend that continues even more!
If they are working because it is important to them for more than financial reasons, I agree. So many continue to work as they need the money. We need to get more people saving for retirement.
I am inspired by your motivation to live a long healthy and productive life. I think if more people in society thought this way, the world would be a better place. I have never thought of taking care of the elderly as taking care of myself as well. This is really interesting to think about. Thanks for sharing.
This is a great article. It is important to always make seniors feel that they are involved in decisions someone makes regarding their care services. I agree and if we put ourselves in the shoes of an elderly we will do a lot more greater things.
As much as possible, I don’t want to put my parents on a Home Care service. I want to take care of them by myself. I will give them all the best they can get for the rest of their lives.
There’s nothing wrong with being picky about who you allow to provide care for an elderly loved one. Be sure to ask agencies if they background check their caregivers and if so, what methods they use.
Home care are time consuming. It becomes difficult to caregivers to juggle their time. Home care assistance is a necessity which enables a family caregiver to spare lot of time on priorities which can be done by a home care specialist.