SCREAM! (and the healthy alternatives)

Small scream (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

“A good many dramatic situations begin with screaming.” – Jane Fonda

October 12th is International Moment of Frustration Scream Day. This brings back memories of college primal scream gatherings the evenings during finals. Yup, I was out there joining the crowd in releasing tension, taking a break from studying.

Reflecting on my experiences and seeing a notice about October 12th encouraged me to ask some questions.

Table of Contents

What things make you scream?

Here are my thoughts in no particular order:

Extremely painful situations
Roller coasters
Being startled
Some frustrating situations
When needed help/assistance
Bad dreams/nightmares

Does screaming help?

When there is a threatening situation, it does alert others to the problem and could bring assistance to the person screaming.

It can a way of expressing fun and bringing others to join in. (It seems as though this applies to roller coasters and to little children at play.)

The short answer is yes it can relieve stress. I can tell you being in a group and not feeling alone in my frustration and tension helped relieve the stress. It was a social event. A 3 – minute break from the effort. but there ar other ways. (I’ll share alternatives in a moment.)

Is it safe to scream?

Screaming can damage the vocal folds. (No, this is not something to try to explain to your two-year old.) Loud, well supported sounds after vocal warm-up are safer. Just like an athlete, those who sing and speak as part of their work should do warm-up and stay hydrated.

What are my other options?

While the reason for screaming will inform your options, here are just a few for dealing with frustration.

Heavy sighs.
Playing it out on an instrument
Exercise
Meditation
Stepping away from the situation for a moment

What others alternatives can you recommend for venting frustrations? Share them in the comments below.

14 Comments

irenesavarese on 5 October, 2012 at 8:37 am

Here is a few of my ideas for how to deal with frustrations:

Painting is very effective for children (and adults) with troubles expressing their emotions.

We used to dance, sing and being silly with our children when they were small.

Talk about mixed emotions including the softer, primary emotions (anger is a secondary emotion).
- JoAnn Jordan on 5 October, 2012 at 11:49 am
  
  Creative outlets are wonderful ways for expressing many emotions. Your insights are appreciated.
Rachelle Norman on 5 October, 2012 at 10:13 am

I am not a runner, but when I’m really steamed, running lets me get out that energy. Quiet things (meditation, deep breathing) don’t really work for me when I’m really angry, but they do help me stay calmer over the long run.

My two-year-old is in a stage where screaming is fun and sometimes communicative of anger/fear/etc.
- JoAnn Jordan on 5 October, 2012 at 11:45 am
  
  Rachelle, I agree. Running can be a great outlet for anger. And I also do best meditating before I am steamed.
Linda Esposito on 5 October, 2012 at 12:59 pm

Getting your problems out in the open is a wonderful way to deal with frustration. Therapy, a trusted friend or colleague, a member of your church, anyone you can go to for an honest assessment of the situation which makes you feel stuck.

For this reason sometimes friends are not the best go-tos and you really need someone who’s going to offer a truthful analysis with actionable steps to help get you through.
- JoAnn Jordan on 5 October, 2012 at 5:04 pm
  
  Amen! to that, Linda.
Kathy Morelli, LPC (@KathyAMorelli) on 9 October, 2012 at 2:38 pm

Hey JoAnn – I have been in unrelenting stress for quite some time. Whenever it feels like there is an equilibrium attained, then something new happens, The situation is so complex, and the complexity shows no signs of going away. Exercise works for me, a nice massage, crying helps, talking to friends (I have lots of therapists friends) and I am now going to finally go book myself a nice session with a therapist I have seen for 10 years (I havent seen her in abt seven years) but she knows who I am and I can talk with hr. I need it. Now for a good scream AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
- JoAnn Jordan on 9 October, 2012 at 4:05 pm
  
  Hope the stress begins to fall away, Kathy. And, thanks for the scream =)
Ann Becker-Schutte on 12 October, 2012 at 11:14 am

JoAnn,

I am a big fan of writing or creating something that expresses the feelings. For kids this can be a drawing. I’m a bit like Rachelle–if I’m really upset, I need to be active. That might be a walk, vigorous cleaning, something to burn the energy. And, I am a huge fan (no shock) of safe space like therapy.

Warmly,
Ann
- JoAnn Jordan on 12 October, 2012 at 10:18 pm
  
  Love your list, Ann!
Kat Fulton on 19 November, 2012 at 8:07 pm

Love it! ha! My friends and I get together and scream sometimes. We also break glass together. Last time, we got an old bed sheet, went way back into a canyon, bought some cheap glass from a thrift store, stood far back from the sheet, and BAM! Shattering all old habits, old ideas of who we once were in the world, old patterns.

And we became new.

Thanks for the reminder here, JoAnn =)
- JoAnn Jordan on 19 November, 2012 at 8:45 pm
  
  What a fun idea, Kat. That is one I may have to try. So what makes good glass breaking music?
Noel on 22 June, 2013 at 2:13 pm

This design is spectacular! You obviously know how to keep a reader amused.
Between your wit and your videos, I was almost
moved to start my own blog (well, almost…HaHa!) Fantastic job.

I really loved what you had to say, and more than that, how you presented it.

Too cool!
- JoAnn Jordan on 23 June, 2013 at 4:41 pm
  
  Glad you enjoyed the post Noel. Let me know if there is another topic you’d like me to cover.